The following is a collection of ridiculous or ridiculously profound things heard in real conversations, spotted on Twitter, or read in books throughout the month of February.
Jonathan Little: [God] never commands us into intimacy with Him; He only invites.
Katie: Why did you hang the banana from the ceiling?
Jeff Goins: Your calling is to bring a piece of heaven to earth.
Someone: You put the toilet paper on the wall, right?
Angela: Yes, the housekeepers love that. They pull it off, collect it, and sell it on eBay.
Jeff Dolan: Holy Spirit is invading my Holy Spirit’s personal space.
Jason: It’s kind of like a bridge. A walkway over the water.
Katie: A pier?
Helen Keller: Character cannot be developed in ease and quiet, only through experience of trial and suffering can the soul be strengthened, vision cleared, ambition inspired, and success achieved. (qtd. in More or Less)
Luis: And if we have any parasites, in the name of Jesus, just kill ‘em!
Jeff: You have some sunscreen under your left nostril. Actually, it’s in your nose. Higher. Can I borrow you camera?
Allen: If you ever need a house, we have one. It’s made of foam.
Casey: That won’t work. It’s too cold where she lives. She’ll freeze.
Allen: We could get that Pink Panther thing, you know, that you get to put on the top and sides. What’s that called?
Joseph Cavanaugh: Your gift is meant to be used for the benefit of others–and to give you great joy whenever you use it to help someone else. (The Language of Blessing, xv)
Katie: You just got attacked by a bus.
Kid, age 5: That’s the awesome part!
Michael Hyatt: The only part of your topic that’s unique is you.
Jeff: Unless there’s cilantro in it, it isn’t salsa. It’s just tomatoes hanging out.
[Overheard on a plane]
Guy: I dropped my phone. Do you see it back there?
Lady: Yes, but it’s up there. Straight down.
Guy: Ok, got it.
Lady: Nope, that’s my foot.
Angela: If you give me five dollars, I’ll let you spit out that window.
Katie: Sorry, I gave it to some homeless person.
Jeff: How do you do what you love? Start by loving what you do.
Katie: That Tupperware lid has some sauce on it. You might want to rinse it before you put it away.
Matt: Did she hear you? Mom, Katie said that one’s dirty.
Ms. Donna: I heard her. I licked it off before I put it away.
Jonathan Martin: Evangelism is most often a matter of pointing out what a person has already seen that is beautiful and good and taking him/her back to the source.
Katie: Kenna, how come I haven’t had a hug yet today?
Kenna, age 5: Because you haven’t given me one yet.
Ed Cyzewski: God has not mapped out my life, but God has mapped out my heart and marked me as His own.
What are you looking for?