Living in two different states and moving every nine months does a number on friendships. I find myself seeing friends long enough for a coffee date once every few months… or years.
I’ve learned a lot of practical stuff like how to skip the small talk, how fast to summarize what I’m up to, and when to have an exit excuse and when to let the day disappear into the mocha.
While I cherish and try to take advantage of every month I get to spend with these long-distance friends, I’ve also been able to see trends both in myself and in my friends.
Sure, there are simple things like he always runs late or she never can decide what to order, but there are also bigger things like six months ago he was struggling with finances. Today, he’s still in a financial mess. Nine months ago she hated her job. Today, she’s still working a job she hates.
More than anything, it makes me question what kind of impact I’m having or aura I’m giving off.
Other than moving a million times, how have I changed in the last six, nine, twelve months?
Did I quit the job I didn’t believe in?
Did I confront the roommate I had an issue with?
Did I publish the ebook I keep talking about?
Was 2013 really the year of joy?
These questions hurt because I know the answers are not always ones I’m proud of.
Three, six, nine, and twelve months have passed and I still haven’t done what I set out to do.
One day at a time I let life slip away without accomplished goals, doing what I’ve been called to do, and handling situations the way I should.
This realization is especially sensitive right now with 2013 coming to a close and the majority of my 2013 goals un-accomplished.
It’s hard to look back an account for my time.
Too much time on Facebook? Blogging?
Too much time on the road? Moving?
Too much time doing what needs to be done for tomorrow and not doing what needs to be done next week.
What if today I let my dishes go unwashed and blog un-updated because I was writing that magazine article I promised months ago?
What if instead of crossing off today’s to-do list items, I looked down the road a little while and spent time working on those?
It’s like being a student: even though you knew about that major project all semester long, you started it too late because you were always working on tomorrow’s homework.
Well, in life, there’s no crunch time. Deadlines look different. And major projects are neglected for years.
Today they’re pursued. Today they’re confronted. Today they’re a top priority.
What would it take to make a long-term goal a top priority in your life today?
Disclaimer: none of the examples are directed at specific friends. If you think one might be you and we’ve not talked about it, it’s someone else.
What are you looking for?