It was due to no lack of trying that I went to the concert by myself. I think I invited ten people who all couldn’t go for one reason or another. I was bummed but willing to roll with it.
The artist told us to hug the person sitting next to us. No worries. I go to concerts alone. I’m a pro at this moment: find the other awkward person.
To my right was the equivalent of five empty seats before I found a family all hugging each other. I looked back down the pew in front of me, all couples hugging. To my left was the aisle. The other side of the aisle didn’t contain my other awkward person.
By this point the “hug someone” moment was over so I didn’t dare turn around and make desperate eye contact with the person behind me until I received a hug.
Instead I sat down. And cried.
Loneliness stung. A lot.
Ever since then, I get nervous when I hear “Turn to the person next to you.”
I’ve learned to divert at that moment. Gosh, I’m thirsty. My lips are really chapped. Did I just get a text? I should Instagram.
Last weekend Peder Eide‘s audience wouldn’t let me.
If the song motions included others, they made sure I was involved. Awkward eye contact and all.
When he asked us to put our arms around our family, they invited me. At first I accepted. But then I pulled away.
They were making decisions as a family. Even though I went to the concert alone, my whole family was there. If I crashed the car on my way home, my whole family was in a car accident. My whole family has decided we’re going all around the world next year.
Sure, I’ve got great parents, sisters, and future brother-in-law. I’ve got beloved friends scattered around the world. I’ve got three congregations I call my home church.
But at the end of the day, I’m single. My family is me, myself, and I.
And sometimes that means you’re left out of the audience-hugging moments.
I’m not really sure what Peder asked families to think about. I was caught up in the moment. And my loneliness.
That was the exact word in my head when we started singing again.
“All about the glory of You, Lord.”
Loneliness stinks. There’s no way around it.
I’ve pep-talked myself through this season of life more times than I care to count. But usually the pep-talk includes a reminder of what (I hope) is waiting at the end. It usually involves words like “patience” and “worth it.”
It doesn’t usually include the words “God’s glory.”
In fact, I’d never thought about this phase of singleness being used for His glory.
If He’s using it for His glory–which I’m sure He is–then I’m in.
Hug-less concerts and all.
All about the glory of You, Lord.
It’s apparently National Singles Week. No one told me until Tuesday which means you probably didn’t know either. Pick one of your single friends and take him/her out to dinner for no reason but you’re grateful he/she is in your life.
What are you looking for?